Sunday, March 8, 2009

The Donut Man Will Come And Get All Of You Pie Lovers

This week has been much better, but I've still had a hard time with my depression. And you know how I told you guys how I've been gaining allot of weight? Well I think that's because of all the stress. Also at Church we did this little survey thing where the teacher asked you questions about your life, and how much stress and noise is in it, and I scored 85 which was the highest in the class. LOL There is NO silence, non-stop worrying and just so much NOISE!! One of the questions was do you wake up in the middle of the night worrying, and I was the only one who answered yes. That was probably one of the most touching and honest Sunday school classes I've ever had. Everyone now knows that I have depression and anxiety issues and that I have a therapist, and I didn't really want them to know that, but when I was talking it just all spilled out. Everyone was so silent and I got a few hugs and pats on the back. I don't like it that they feel sorry for me. It makes me feel pathetic and just like a baby. UGH THEY FELT SORRY FOR ME!!! I HATE that so much. Now they'll be treating me differently. They may treat me nicer but still....LOL I went to youth group tonight and we played broom ball. I said hi to everyone in the ice skating rink!! Some of my friends helped me. You know how I told you about Brock? Well he's supposed to email me...also when we where in the bus it made me think of know before I was home schooled. I've been thinking about maybe I DO want to go to high school but I'm not sure. I just think that everyone should get a shot at high school because that's one of the biggest times in your life. I can't make up my mind. And my friend Aly is so sad that I probably won't go to high school, because her friends are all going to East high school and she's going to North. Only her friend Ashley is going to North and their not really that close. I wish I could be there for her so badly, I know how she feels, being alone. But she isn't really, all the guys like her, she's had like 15 boyfriends the past two years, and I've NEVER had a true boyfriend that actually cared for me. She had her freaking first kiss. I know I'm a little jealous, but most people would be. Haha I'm holding Kyoko she's sitting on my arm. I helped cleaned out my friend garage and also I spent the night at her house. It was so fun!!! WE were watching TV and this guy on there got mad at this other guy and he started screaming and he made this really funny face he LOOKED LIKE A CHICKEN MAN LOL LOL LOL!!!!!!!!! Now we bring up the chicken man whenever we need to make each other laugh. When we where cleaning out the garage though, she kept on pulling out stuff and kept on asking me if I wanted it, so I ended up keeping some lotion and body gel, some make up and some clothes. LOL she was basically shoving the things in my arms begging me to keep it. Her sister also gave me a purse. It's so pretty. Wow this was a long post...GOODBYE!!!
Also go to my Imeem page:



Blogger James said...

Very awesome with the movie and the chicken man. It sounds funny. :) I know what you mean about the depression. When people find out, they treat you so much differently. Its like, o feel bad for the person who has a therapist because their life sucks and we need to pity her. Ugh, I know exactly how ya feel. Pity her because she is always sad and depression and all that jazz. Its like, shut up! Don't pity me don't treat me differently. The best thing you can do for me is to treat me equally and just be a friend to me. Wow the stress thing sounds really intense. If you go to high school, be prepared from a different from home schooling. Its nothing like home schooling. Its more non learning, and socializing and such. Anyway, stay strong.

March 8, 2009 at 8:44 PM  
Blogger Nixx said...

yeah, its kind of annoying when people are forcefully giving stuff to u. u dont want to say that u dont want it, because u dont want to hurt their feelings, but u kno that u might never use it. *sigh*


March 9, 2009 at 1:47 PM  
Blogger Kristlynn said...

I'm sorry that people sympathesized with you like that :( after people knew I was very sad because my brother was at a treatment center everytime I was really tired they would think i was sad bc of my brother and they would always think I was always sad, and they were just soo UGHHH

March 9, 2009 at 7:00 PM  
Blogger sugar said...

omg hi check out my awsome blog!!!!

March 10, 2009 at 4:20 PM  
Blogger ☽ruby☾ said...

i totally get what you said about your youth group, and the hole feeling sorry for you. i totally get that. i dont really go to my youth group anymore kind of because of that. they treat you way differently when they think you have issues.


Love your blog!

March 10, 2009 at 7:46 PM  
Blogger Allison said...

Yea people can give you a little too much support its like okay i get it back off! I've been waking up in the middle up the night every night too. its really exhausting after awhile cuz i can't fall asleep. i try and be happy for my friend but its just so hard sometimes. I hope you get feeling better though. Unfortunatly depression never really goes away. Sometimes it feels like its gone and then bam its back again. trust me i know. Stick with your friends though don't be afraid to tell them things in your life. Sure everyone is going to feel sorry for you but u just have to take that as they just care for you which is really nice.

March 11, 2009 at 3:09 PM  
Blogger D I B S Y said...

ur title makes me laugh lmao.

March 13, 2009 at 4:20 PM  
Blogger James said...

U also mean to me a lot. maybe, when we both grow up a little, and we can both confirm that we will not try to kill each other cuz we are crazy (or maybe not phyco crazy ;) we can meet each other. I never like to treat people with pity, I treat them with compassion and understanding which is a huge difference. I really get the depression. Thats cuz I have it. :D don't forget. Pie is good ;) always here to talk.

March 15, 2009 at 1:57 PM  
Blogger ShadowFlame said...

it annoys me when people keep feeling sorry for you and start treatign you different...GAH!!

March 18, 2009 at 1:49 PM  

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